Letting go – resistance is what causes our suffering

Holding grudges. Negative self-talk. Being stubborn. Hiding out, playing it safe. Not listening to people. Hiding our feelings. Feeling different or separate from others. Trying to be like other people. Struggling with perfectionism. All of these are examples of our resistance to the world around us. So how do we notice our resistance when it appears? What are the clues that might signal we are resisting what ‘is?’  We might notice that we feel isolated or lonely; or we feel disconnected from others; we might feel an emptiness or inexplicable anger inside. A feeling of hopelessness can pervade our lives. Often inertia and paralysis strike when we are struggling with resistance. Likely we feel that life has not met our expectations, or that something vital is missing that would give it meaning and fulfillment. What to do when we experience these feelings? By the time we start noticing these signs it is evidence that we have been ignoring our inner voice and it has caught up with us and that the time has come to look within ourselves for solutions to what ails us.  I started this blog last month and return to it. I realized as I wrote my morning pages this morning that I have been hiding out. As though hiding out were to bring me safety.  MY WONDERFUL INSIGHT FOR TODAY THAT I WISH TO SHARE WITH YOU IS THIS: when I feel resistance and I am inclined to want to withdraw, I am choosing the method I used as a terrified child.  Afraid to speak up and to show up and possibly to face the potential of being scorned or humiliated. For hadn’t I been told that children are meant to be seen and not heard?  Given this upbringing, is it any wonder that at times we seek the safety of hiding out from the world?  THE IRONY IS THAT this pattern of behaviour does nothing to build us up or to help us thrive and to grow. So the cost of seeking safety takes a terrible toll: denial of our selves and our birthright to fulfillment, full expression and happiness.  Start today and listen to your heart. And notice when you are taking on the habit of reacting to life in the child-like ways when  you were small, defenceless and completely dependent upon the good will of adult figures in your life. YOU ARE A GROWN-UP TODAY! Recognize your power and your ability to make new rules for yourself. Reclaim the beautiful, joyful and magnificent self you are if you’ll only give yourself permission. It is the greatest gift you can give yourself in this season of re-birth and celebration.  Blessings to you all during this joyous season of hope and renewal, and a Happy New Year to you all.

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